at night, i still have unwanted dreams. not exactly nightmares, cuma perkara yang aku tidak mahu lihat waktu tidur. untuk seseorang yang lebih kurang senang terpengaruh dengan mimpi, it's kind of unhealthy for me to be having the dreams. kadang-kadang, it goes on for weeks. situation lain-lain tapi always the same plot di mana pada hujung mimpi ada cue untuk reality kemudian baru aku terjaga. it never ended sweetly. always, always mimpi itu akan berpanjangan sampai part reality muncul.
anne cakap, "layankan aje."
mili, "itu mainan perasaan. it's just you. itu semua past."
it's tiring to be getting this stuff which i don't need it at all. macam ditanya soalan yang sama berulang-kali, macam iklan raya Petronas where the boy kept asking, "burung apa?". mungkin aku sendiri yang invite the reality to come in my dreams where the situations were obviously surreal dan aku ada doubts about it. sort of the law of attractions. memang terang-terangan kau, aku tahu the solution. but it's easier said than done.
personally, aku rasa hope hanya buat kita lebih sengsara.
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