i feel better today because lastnight, mili's friend was sooooooo kind that she gave me 2 bikinis, 3 tops & 1 boardshorts, f.o.c. despite of me not smiling at her on a previous occasion because i was rabun & i have this short term memory lost. well, lately, that's been happening to me: unknown girls smiling at me. and, and, and...i didn't act friendly at all. "owh. you're so kedekut senyum" said mili. eh, bukanlah. i'm not a snob. maybe that recent attitude have got something to do with self-confidence. i just shut people off by not making any type of contact: eye, smile, body language. even lastnight at the bank, there were a couple of drag-queens hanging around & i guess they kinda like my hairdo, saying out loud "cantik la dia. cantik la dia." i should've at least smile at them, right? tapi aku buat pekak. like nobody was there, saying nothing. oh well. i'll try to remind myself next time to smile.
i can't wait for the day to end so i can straight go to the aquarium shop and get me a new REAL aquarium (because all these while i've been keeping my fishes in cookie jars).
hmmm...i'm on YM with 'hearts & he's not saying anything about his friends gathering this saturday.
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