Trendy for the fun of it so let's make fun of it

Hidup kita tidaklah sesusah mana, mahupun senang. And life is not unfair, it's actually fair pasal kalau selalu sangat di atas roda, nanti lupa daratan lalu jadi angkuh kemudian memakan diri sendiri. Aku kira, hidup di kota memang agak susah, to catch with everything around us. Eventhough the escalator here in kota durjana tidak sepantas di kota singa, but still, pembangunan berkejaran sesama sendiri. Termasuk individu yang terlibat dalam sistem harian kota durjana. Each of us racing to grab our identities. Siapa yang dulu, siapa yang tiru. How everyone avoided to be everyone else but at the end of the day they became the majority.

Anne datang singgah makan late Italian lunch. We had a conversation about kids hanging out at Pavillion, trends and hipsters. Weird, but i always cringe at the word 'hipster'. Probably because i'm one or maybe not. Dan aku selalu pity mereka yang di gelar hipsters pasal you can't help it, really. Mungkin perkara yang sama terjadi 20-30 years ago but i really don't know. Should google up facts or wiki things up but i'm just too lazy. Aku cuma mahu type apa yang aku rasa tanpa dipengaruhi oleh anasir or M. Nasir, whichever.

Okay. I think i have an issue with tumblr. People reposting stuff from other peopl who repost stuff from other people too. Aku selalu pening mahu cari the real source, but what the heck, in this century, nothing's original anymore. Terlalu banyak idea yang sudah disuarakan, didebatkan. Sorry, aku macam annoyed sikit tapi sukahatilah kau mahu tumblr ke, blogspot ke, wordpress ke. Kalau passion kau memang yang itu, tidak perlu pedulikan orang lain. I'm just typing what i'm feeling at the moment. Hey, maybe in 2 years time i might have my own tumblr. Who knows? They say, "never say never".

Among my siblings, i decided that i'm the black sheep. Even Anne agreed that i'm the fucked up one. I don't really communicate with my parents (like how they don't communicate at all with each other) like i'm the only one who can't sit and have a chat with them even for a mere 10 minutes pasal kemudian aku senang restless. Sometimes, aku harap yang aku boleh jadi cermin for both of them. Sometimes, aku sedih memikirkan situasi aku yang macam terabai tapi selalunya aku cuba tolak tepi the fact that i came from a broken family. Masa muda (oh tidak, aku tidaklah setua mana pun sekarang) i always pictured a broken family is where the dad is a drunkard, mom always crying, they're always fighting, loud cries from the children, broken vases, you know, benda messy macam itu. Jadi i always told myself that we're not really a broken family. Tapi aku kira, for someone from a totally picture perfect family would feel sorry for me. perbandingan masing-masing lain (like how a friend totally tekankan bahawa aku seorang hipster dan socialite walhal aku rasa ada orang yang lebih layak to be labeled that).

Satu hari yang depress, i decided to get a longboard. I've always wanted to try it, so i say, "why not?". Funny, i'm more confident when standing alone, single. Oops, timing salah pasal apparently seorang lelaki Melayu forecast bahawa longboard will be the new fixie. Hmm..i can't say much to that pasal like what i said earlier, kita semua berlumba-lumba mahu look cool, feel cool. Mahu label siapa otai and the likes. Bahh, aku hanya mahu be good at balancing, paddling and being single.

I'm 27, broken hearted and just started taking up longboard. I am so having a mid-life crisis.

So, to get over depression, lebih baik main longboard dan jadi trendy atau end it all dengan suicide?